The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
by Dr. Brené Brown
I read, heard and watched much of Brené Brown’s later work before reading this seminal work of hers. Despite the inevitable overlaps, it was still a great discourse on courage, compassion and connection – the gifts of imperfection.
Typical of Dr. Brown’s now established style, the wisdom in this book is presented mostly through the anecdotal accounts of her own responses to her research findings, which she categoriseszes into ten guideposts: authenticity, self-compassion, resilience, gratitude and joy, intuition and trusting, comparison, play and rest, calm and stillness, meaningful work and laughter, song and dance.
These ten guideposts make up what she terms wholehearted living.
Depending on your purpose, this book can be taken as casual, feel-good reading. If you’re consciously working on your self, it can open doors to some critical awareness. In this regard, the term “guidepost” is apt; it points out the way for further exploration. The writing never delves too deep or too technically into any one topic, although it is always meaningful and contextualised (usually in the form of Dr. Brown’s personal stories).
For me, I take away these key reminders: the assurance that I am enough. That whatever I choose to do, it is enough that I strive to fulfil my own aspirations, and not the expectations of others. That I am allowed to rest and play. That I have inherent worth, which is independent of the quality of my work (a belief that requires much of my effort to practice).
That connection requires courage; courage to make my boundaries – which tend to be hard – more porous, by being willing to be vulnerable… being willing to share my truth, my needs, my fears and my failings, with those who “have earned the right” to hear my stories.
That I can never offer too much compassion to others and especially, to myself.
I would recommend this book, while emphasizing the “guidepost” level of information. Further learning – especially in the form of practice – is needed if you’re looking into self work in these areas.